Thursday, September 27
Sometimes, just a little bit ♥
Sometimes, I wonder who can I really turn to when I'm upset over something.
Do I really have a friend/family to speak to?
I guess not? Since most of the time I keep to myself. I tend not to tell people why I'm upset. Not that I don't want to share, but I just thought that they wouldn't really understand even if I told them. I mean who would?
& when they don't really understand or if they find that there's nothing they can do to make me feel better, it makes me feel worse knowing that my friends kind of give up on trying (to make me feel better) or when they find it absurd that you're sad over something stupid (to them).
Honestly, I can't truly say that I totally understand why my friends get upset over not doing well enough when I am here being upset over the fact that I'm doing bad. I mean, i admit that even i sometimes, cant understand why they are upset over something so not worth to be upset about.
& who's to say that I'm bad? My grades maybe?
But it isn't that bad. Passable I'd say.
But it's bad (in my point of view)
So back to the point on I don't really understand why my friends get upset over their lack of performance/poor grades (in their perspective), now that I think of it, I think I can sort of relate to that? BUT the point is, there's no way I can make them feel better about it, & similarly, no one can make me feel better.
You have to get over the fact that your grades are not doing as well as the A+ students & you need to move on.
Nobody can help you do that, unless someone buys over the prof & get him to grant you an A for a price. Does that make you happy then?
now back to me being unhappy over my grades. I often blame myself for not putting enough effort for if I spent just a little more time on mugging & a little less time on sleeping/watching/playing, maybe, just maybe, I can easily get my A too.
& honestly, lack of time is seriously the worse excuse. But I say that all the time trying to make myself feel better. But I don't, really. I just despise myself even more for finding lame excuse & I end up working harder for it by putting away those lame excuses & finding time & determination to do better than before!
I guess that works for me.
Now that I'm writing it out, I finally realise. :)
Started off with a :(
Now I'm ending with a :D
& going back to my books now :)
Love you my dear, for being the only one I can turn to whenever I feel lonely & sad :) <3
I do have "someone" or something to turn to afterall.
